My Scratch Pad

:: complete and incomplete thoughts, daydreams and illusions ::

Text Message

In desperation, Grace got her cellphone from her desk and typed a message:

You said you'd never leave me. You said it. You said it many times.
How am I supposed to go on without you?

Tears welled in her eyes as she sat on her bed, and pressed "Send". She watched until the screen said "Message Sent", and then unceremoniously dropped her cellphone beside her. She cried, not knowing what to do, or expect. But knowing that no one could help her, not right then, she just kept crying.

Beep!

She jumped, startled. And her tears momentarily paused. It was certainly a coincidence for one of her friends to send her a text message, just at that moment. She got her cellphone and pressed the button to read it. When she saw the name of the message sender in her Inbox, she dropped the phone. Had she read it right? Did he actually reply to her message?

Her fingers shaking, she reached again for her cellphone, and opened the message. It must be one of his sisters, telling her that he wasn't using that phone anymore, she figured. But she was wrong.

I'm sorry.

It said. And she began crying again. Unable to stop herself, she replied:

What am I going to do now?

This time, she held on to her phone, looking at the screen.

Beep!

The message alert appeared after a few minutes. She opened the message, and read:

You'll think of something. You're one of the bravest people I know. You can get through this.

Grace furrowed her eyebrows. With less fear, and more anger, she replied:

If this is your idea of a joke, it's not funny at all, she sent the message, and waited...

Beep!

If it will take a joke to cheer you up, I'd gladly tell you one, Your Grace. was the response.

She was startled. Your Grace, she read. Nobody else called her that except Michael. And nobody but the two of them, knew about it. It couldn't have been a joke. It was definitely Michael on the other end. But... how? she wondered. And then asked; How are you doing this?

Beep!

The response came quickly: That's not important. You wanted to talk to me, and so I replied. That's all that matters.

Will you always be here, then? she wanted to know.

Beep!

No. I can't. You know that.

So... this is the last time?

Beep!

Yes.

Grace blinked, several times. She had a hard time reading now, due to the tears in her eyes. She read the three-letter word again and again. She didn't want to accept it. It took her a long time to compose another message, she was feeling weaker by the second. But finally she finished, and sent another:

Why did you leave me?

She was heaving as she waited for her phone to beep. It was taking longer than the messages before. She panicked. What if the last one was really the last? Would he really leave her without saying goodbye?

Beep!

The message alert tone finally played. When she saw his name in her Inbox, she couldn't believe it. He still replied. And his taking a long time to do so made her think that he probably really thought about it before he sent it. It made her think for a moment, that maybe he could still do that.

I didn't leave. I'll always be with you. If you ever had any doubts about that before, now you never will. Now you'll know for sure, that I will never love anyone else. I am forever yours.

She shook head as she finished reading it. "It's useless, you idiot," she said as she started at his name indicated below the message. "I don't care about that anymore. I just wish you were here, talking to me face to face..." her voice trailed off. And she got even weaker, not noticing that she'd let go of her cellphone, and had fallen asleep.

****

Beep!

Grace woke up. And immediately remembered that she'd fallen asleep with her cellphone beside her. There was a new message in her Inbox.

She opened it. It was from one of Michael's sisters, Anna:

Grace, the memorial service starts in an hour. We know it's hard, but we really hope you can say a few words to everyone. You, after all, knew him best.

She strained her eyes and read the message again. Right. Michael's memorial service was today. When she left the hospital the night before, she'd cried until she got home. She only vaguely remembered his sister telling her that she had to give a eulogy in the memorial service today. She also vaguely remembered a strange dream.

She pressed the "reply" button and told Anna that she would be at the chapel in half an hour. After sending the message, an alert saying her Phone Mailboxes were full appeared on the screen. And she opened the Phone Outbox to delete her Sent Messages. When it had finished loading, she gasped. There were several messages in her Outbox, most of which were sent to Michael. She opened her Phone Inbox, and sure enough, the messages from him last night were all in there as well.

It wasn't a dream... she thought. And dressed up quickly to find out the truth.

****

"Michael's phone?" Anna repeated, when Grace had asked her if they'd already sold it to anyone.

"Yes," she said. "Do you remember who bought it? Or is it with any of your relatives?"

Anna shook her head. "It came back in pieces. It was ruined in the accident. We... didn't think of getting it fixed or anything because it was too damaged. We threw it away," she said. "Did you... want to keep it?"

Grace shook her head. "No, it's just that, I received this message from his number last night," she said, and showed her cellphone to her.

"What? Where?" Anna asked, looking at the screen of Grace's phone.

Grace looked at it. But the messages were gone. "Wait," she said. "They were right here," she said, and then opened her Outbox to see if the messages she'd sent were still there, too. But they were gone as well. "But they were here!" she said, again on the verge of tears.

"Listen," Anna told her, as she put her hand on her shoulder. "You're tired, and you're sad. Maybe you should get some rest. You don't need to do the eulogy if you don't want to."

She shook her head. "No, no. I want to do it," she said. "I just..." her voice trailed off and she put her cellphone back in her pocket.

"I'll see you later, then," Anna said to her as she walked back to greet more guests that have arrived.

Beep!

Grace jumped. She took her phone out, and opened the new text message that had just come. It was from her friend, giving her condolences to her, and for Michael. "I guess it must've been a dream after all," she whispered to herself, although she knew in her heart, that it really wasn't.

END
10.Mar.2008 21:40

by: distantorigin at 13:40 | link | comments