My Scratch Pad

:: complete and incomplete thoughts, daydreams and illusions ::

Mr. Doorway Man

For some weird reason, the only times that we interact with each other are the times that we have to pass through a doorway.

We were from departments that didn't really have anything to do with each other, hence there was no need to interact for us really. But coincidentally, or perhaps it was fate who did it, whenever I passed through a doorway, he would, too.

Sometimes we'd be going opposite directions, sometimes in the same direction. Sometimes, he'd get off the elevator just as I'm going in, and sometimes we'd take the elevator together, to go either up or down, although when that happens, there are normally other people around so even then, we don't get to talk. Not that there was anything to talk about. We had never been introduced. I doubt if he even knows my name. Although, he did seem to notice that we have a way of meeting each other in between doorways.

Once, I was going out of the pantry, having just refilled my mug with water, when I saw him halfway across the hall, walking towards my direction. I saw him, and I knew where he was going, but I don't know. Somehow it didn't register in my brain that I had to move to make way. Personally, I blame my lack of sleep that day, but instead of stepping aside like we both usually did, to give the other space to pass, this time, I stepped right in front of him, and probably from the surprise, he wasn't able to step away right away.

Yup. That's exactly what happened. I bumped into him, cup of water and all, and got so off-balance, I accidentally poured the water all over his shirt, and held onto him for support because I nearly dropped to the floor.

"Hey, easy now!" he said, helping me stand up.

I held onto him still, now trying not to slip on the puddle of water we were both standing in. "I'm so sorry!" I said, finally looking up.

He just smiled.

by: distantorigin at 13:52 | link | comments

Weirdest Things I've Done

Because I'm so envious of my siblings who seem to have done everything, I shall now count my blessings and list down all the things I've done that I don't think other people have.

1. Ride a ship.
2. Ride an airplane.
3. Skydive from 12,000ft. Tandem of course.
4. Jump a 35-foot cliff/waterfall
5. Rapel a 65-foot waterfall
6. Zip line
7. White water rafting
8. Cruise on the Nile River
9. Ride a gazillion roller coasters in U.S.A.
10. Eiffel Tower
11. Tokyo Tower
12. River cross (as in high school CAT style)
13. Elephant show in Thailand.

I'll add more when I remember them. Right now, the list seems pathetic. :(

by: distantorigin at 02:09 | link | comments

Where is Subterrania?

That place Luis Katigbak described in his Palanca Award-winning story of the same title. Where is it? I want to go there. Hontou ni ikitai yo. I wish I could live that way. I wish I could be Kaye. And I wouldn't even care if I grow extra limbs or mutate into some kind of goat. At this point, I think being an animal is better than being human. Animals don't have to put on a mask. And if they don't have any other animal friends, they die easily. I wonder if animals have ever committed suicide. As in, intentionally.

I want to go to Subterrania. So I can be alone. So I can be really alone, and no longer have to put up an image. I don't have to be polite. I don't have to be nice. I don't even have to be smart. I can just be me.

by: distantorigin at 04:28 | link | comments

Drown Out the Laughter

I am aware that it is wrong to wish ill of others. But just this once, I wish for them not to laugh.

Why does laughter happen whenever I'm not around?
How can people still laugh? Can they not see me? Can they not see my pain? I am crying out for help. I have been clamoring for attention. Yet all they do is laugh and laugh and laugh at things I don't understand.

I wish for silence. I wish for peace. Although they are not laughing at me, they are not laughing at my expense, they are still laughing without me. I am here, but I am not part of what makes them happy. It's as if I'm not here. It's as if I don't matter. I wish to drown out their laughter, that way I will not know they are having fun without me. I will not hear them happy. I will not know, that without me, they are better off.

by: distantorigin at 04:14 | link | comments

Kiss/Kill

From Pink no Itadanshi, that drama with Hiro Mizushima and an irrelevant girl :P

Girl: I'll kiss you.
Hiro: If you kiss me, I'll kill you.
Girl: Even if you kill me, I'll still kiss you!

Asteg!! XD Hehehehe.

by: distantorigin at 07:35 | link | comments